why do parents get angry at their children

I know that I and my husband have shown anger over grades. Yes, usually it is frustration. We don't feel like our children are a reflection of us, but if our oldest (who was undiagnosed Aspergers all the years he was growing up) was completely capable of pulling A's, without even thinking, but got a C because he refused to do homework, then, yes, we did get angry. We couldn't understand why he was doing this.

Was it right? NO! Were we frustrated? YES! We didn't honestly know what was going on in his head. Now, we have a ten year old that is very high-functioning autistic/Asperger's, and he is diagnosed, and we understand that he has difficulty organizing and remembering and thinking. Is he smart? Yes! Is he able to think in a noisy classroom when all he can hear is five different conversations, the lawn mower outside, the air conditioning unit inside, the walking of feet on the carpet in the corridor and the scratch of the chalk on the chalkboard -- all at the same time -- No!

Now that we understand his issues, we are much more calm about grades, and don't expect perfection. But we DO expect him to try. Part of our concern is that we would like him to go to college, a specific college, that has religious background and would fit in more with his very moral outlook.

If he were to go to a community college or a regular university, and come up against the typical morals of the world, it would be extremely hard on him given his very rigid concept of right vs. wrong. Our other two children could go to any university (even our oldest son, who is aspergers as well) and do just fine.

But this youngest son would have it rough.
Understand what verbal abuse is. Verbal abuse is difficult to identify. This type of abuse can happen in all types of families, whether you are rich or poor and regardless of race or location. Below are some common signs of verbal abuse; if you can answer yes to any of these, you may need to contact professionals for help: Do your parents use threats to make you do something or to keep you from doing something?

Do your parents curse at you, call you names, humiliate you in public, or degrade you? When you share your thoughts and feelings about something important with your parents, do your parents ignore you or make fun of you? Are you afraid of your parents?

  • Autor: Roto2
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